
There’re Two Steps to Writing a Book
- Posted by Duane Gordon
- Categories Relationships & Parenting
- Date June 7, 2022
- Comments 1 comment
Many people say they want to write a book and they do!
People with ADHD sometimes say they want to write a book. First, they think about writing the book. Then they say, “I will write the book, but not right now! This is not a good time. I’m too busy.”
But there are people like Tom Holloway, one of our ADDA members. He had an idea for a book, and he wrote the book!
Less than a year ago, Tom attended an Abundance Conference for faith-based Entrepreneurs. At lunch with fellow attendees, other attendees asked him, “What are your secrets for a long marriage?” That question planted the seed for the book.
Coincidentally, the last session in the Conference the next day was a workshop: How to Write a Book! He attended, listened, and learned. The main takeaways he heard were:
The first step to writing a book is…
Start the book.
The second step to writing a book is…
Finish the book.
He decided to start writing his book the very next morning, before an afternoon flight home. After all, starting the book was the first step.
He made a commitment to himself that he was going to write the book. He would write about something that was very near and dear to his heart, his marriage. He had been married for over 53 years to his wonderful, amazing wife, Elaine. In fact, this is where he got the name of the book, 53 Keys to a Successful Marriage.
Tom immediately knew the first three things he wanted to tell people in his book:
- Marriage is fun.
- Marriage is hard (ok, impossible without God’s help)
- Marriage is worth it.
The rest grew from there because that’s how he truly felt.
Tom is a very busy man. Besides writing, he also works full-time, and he has served in various leadership roles in Toastmasters. He is very successful in his Toastmasters’ group.
Tom was diagnosed with ADHD later in life. He was about 50 years old, and he began to suspect he might have ADHD because he kept forgetting things (for example, and regretfully, things he promised Elaine he would do for her.) He works with an ADHD coach, Linda Walker, who has helped him get organized. He also has some very good friends he met through ADDA, and they have helped him along the way. Also, he has his faith, and a great church family. In a crisis, he always helps people, and they help him.
When Tom was writing his book, his wife, Elaine, had been battling dementia for several years. He wanted to share his book with her, so he read her portions of the story of their marriage. Elaine was his inspiration for writing this book, and he takes consolation knowing she heard him as he quietly read each word.
Sadly, Elaine passed away before the book was complete. June 8, 2022, would have been Tom and Elaine’s 54th wedding anniversary so he chose that date, which is today, the day this article is being published, the official launch date of the Kindle version of 53 Keys to a Successful Marriage.
I can’t wait to read it. Tom used his years of hard-won experience in his marriage, combined that with his insight and creativity, which he credits to his ADHD, to write this book. Even better, Tom’s book is now a lasting tribute to his wife Elaine and to their beautiful marriage.
The launch event is on Wednesday, June 8 at 7:00 pm Eastern time. Additional details and registration information for this FREE event are available here.
Duane Gordon is President of the Attention Deficit Disorder Association (ADDA). As Communication Chair, Gordon led development of the ADDA Health Storylines mobile app. Gordon co-chaired two ADDA Conferences, leading the development of the mobile applications used in those conferences. Gordon is an adult with ADHD, an advocate and mentor for adults with ADHD, a founder of the Montreal Adult ADHD Support Group where he frequently presents on the use of technology in coping with ADHD, and Gordon is an expert with over 20 years’ experience in the field of computer technology.
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1 Comment
This is a great article, and Elaine Kawai Walker has been married to me for 23 years, however, we’ve been together as couple for 26 years. My Elaine has C.P from birth and walks with both a crutch and now uses wheelchair.
Like Tom, we too as a couple have based our love and life on Christian values, prayer, much laughter, lots of music and in performing together. When times have been tough or to overflowing, we have committed ourselves to each other and to God. For us, having a solid Christian church home is part of our foundation and our success.
Tom mentions in this article that he read parts of this book to “his Elaine” as she was dealing with Alzheimer’s and kept sharing what their relationship was like for 53 years. What an achievement! Especially with one of the spouces having ADHD! I’m so sorry to hear of Elaine’s passing.
Having this book and in sharing the Holloways’ “loving life lessons to a successful marriage” will be such a testimony and lasting legacy to their friends and family.